Hey Mrs. Elliott!

Whom, you may ask, is Mrs. Elliott? She was my junior high home economics teacher. I've often wondered if she had any idea or even cared how much she affected me in my life. And not, I'm afraid to say, in a positive way.

This was back in the day when all girls had to take home economics. You wouldn't believe how badly I wanted to take shop class so as not to have to be in that woman's class, but it just wasn't allowed. Honestly, I don't remember if I had her for two years of home ec., or if it just seemed like two years.

Cooking classes with her weren't bad. Although I don't think I could say I learned anything from her. My Mom was a far better cook and taught me lots more than Mrs. Elliott could even imagine. But I cannot convey to you how I dreaded walking into that classroom to find the sewing machines rolled up out of their cabinets and ready for us to use.

You see, while we all diligently sewed away on some inane and totally useless project she had selected for us, Mrs. Elliott used to walk around the room. Like the lioness who picks out the most vulnerable looking gazelle, Mrs. Elliott would quietly step up behind the girl she had spotted as the most focused on her work. She would bend over so as to be close to her ear. And then she would scream, "Don't you DARE break that needle!"

This spawn of Satan would then chuckle to herself as she walked away from the quivering blob of adolescence she left in her wake. Evil, I tell you. Pure evil! And because my eyesight always meant I had my nose stuck into the machinery to try to make sure I wasn't sewing my fingers, I was the butt of her evilness on many an occasion.

I always wondered if Mrs. Elliott ever heard of a conditioned response. Probably not. I never took her for the reading sort. You know, Pavlov's dogs. You ring a bell, then feed the dog. After a very few days, the dog starts to drool as soon as the little bell rings. The exact same thing works in humans. And it works just as well if the outcome is punishing as if its rewarding.

And so it was that I would begin to shake and sweat and get a nervous stomach just looking at a sewing machine. Let one start to run anywhere near me, and I would almost faint. I always wanted to like to sew. I enjoy so many other needle arts I really wanted to sew. I've made quilts, but I always pieced and quilted them by hand just so I didn't have to get near a sewing machine.

Years ago, I started watching Eleanor Burns on Quilt-In-A-Day. I was so envious of how quickly she could whip out a quilt top on her machine. Heck, she can even talk and sew at the same time. Genius! Not being able to quickly do up a quilt never stopped me from buying fabrics, though. Lord, no. I've got a whole closet full of fabric. There's a bumper sticker that reads, "The one with the most fabric at the end wins." Apparently, I think I'm in that competition.

I even went out and bought a sewing machine. Yep, I sure did. Years ago. A Husqvarna Viking. A fine sewing machine. And then I put it in the back bedroom and have looked at it every day since. I've even taken it in every year for its annual cleaning. And then put it right back in its place of honor in the back bedroom.

Then, a friend asked me to join her in an on-line class where you learn each month to make two quilt blocks. I agreed. After all, I can hand sew two blocks in a month, right? But one of the patterns for the first month was clearly one that could not be done by hand. Too many layers of cloth to get through. Then I thought, NO. I will do these on my machine or I will not do them at all. I made up one of the blocks. I did it. I actually did it.

My hands shook a bit at first. I was nervous for awhile. But I didn't hurl. I didn't pass out. I didn't even break ONE needle! I got over all that fear. And I really liked that block.

And so, heady with the success of that block, I grabbed some fabric out of my stash. Its a set of woodsy prints with a large block print, plaids, bears, acorns, moose, small prints, pine boughs, and more. The colors are fairly dark and muted, so this won't be a bright, cheery quilt. But in one weekend I've gotten 12 blocks done.

Whooo hooo! First, Thank You Cindy for getting me to take the on-line course. And a big nah, nah, nah, to you Mrs. Elliott, where ever you are you nasty, evil woman. I can use a sewing machine. I can make things on a sewing machine. So stuff it, you old bag! Your curse is broken.